– Sunday 31 January 2010

Hell of the Ashdown, for those of you who have not experienced it before is, as the title suggests, a sportive covering seven hills over Kent and Sussex.

I hadn’t done this before and having heard a lot about it wanted to experience the pain and glory for myself. Having talked my partner Guy into doing it as well (I entered him so he had no choice!) meant that I couldn’t at any point back out.

The ride starts at Charles Darwin school in Biggin Hill. As we arrived at 8:00am it was -0.5 degrees. We had about 5 layers on, a snood over our heads and face, gloves, scarves the lot; we were in danger of being stopped by the fashion police! Our start time was 9:10, just before which we had our briefing from the marshall to say that a risk assessment of the route had been carried out that morning and all roads were safe and passable with care! (Yeah right, we later found out to the contrary!)

The first hill comes within the first mile up Cudham Hill, so you haven’t really had much time to warm up - it’s only short but its very steep and a shock to the system. The route takes you down Hogtrough hill into Brasted and then up hill number two, Toys Hill which is a long steady drag. Going down the other side we had to dismount due to ice spread across the road, the first bit of walking we had to do and not the last as we found out! It was then country roads through Hever, March Green which again proved tricky with ice and slush (which kept clogging up my cleats!).

The third hill came at Dormansland up Hollow Lane. At the end of this lane we did a left along a county road which was really bad with snow and we ended up walking much of this which was so frustrating and of course we started to get really quite cold. It was quite clear that the organisers had not done their risk assessment that morning! The route then went over the A264 at Holtye and along Butcherfield Lane which was very undulating but had some fantastic views. The first feed stop came at Hartfield, in the village hall. The spread was somewhat disappointing with only a banana or Mule bar to choose from, a slice of cake would have been much more appreciated!

After about 10 mins, a hot drink and a pee we set off again. Kidds Hill, number 4 was coming up not long after we departed. This had been the dubbed the “Hell” so I was rather apprehensive about what we were about to face. I think if you prepare yourself for the worst then it’s never as bad as it seems and this was the case for me. Don’t get me wrong, Kidds Hill is very hard, it’s a long slog with it gradually getting steeper and just when you think you are near the top, it goes up further; however the key is to take it nice and steady and don’t look up! Once at the top you are in the Ashdown Forest, again with some wonderful views if you can catch your breath long enough to look at them!

From here it’s a nice descent down Blackhill into Groombridge and then up Groombridge Hill, number 5. This is a tough hill, quite steep and winding but marginally shorter compared to the others previously conquered. At the top of the hill we crossed back over the A264 and went through Fordcombe and just before Penhurst we swung a left towards Chiddingstone then into Sevenoaks Weald. Hill six was Bayleys Hill and where Guy got his puncture. We had done about 55 miles at this stage and were half way up the hill, not the most ideal place to puncture. Fortunately we were just near the photographers so positioned ourselves behind their cars and took advantage of their track pump. Guy and I were ages changing the puncture; honestly we were like two old women bickering about how best to do it. Our sense of humour was now a little strained and we were getting very cold. However we did eventually get on our way again and proceeded up the rest of the hill.

At the top of Bayleys Hill we consulted the route map to see when the next feed stop was – only 3 miles away. Guy thought it odd to have a feed stop so close to the end. Are yes well that’s because we weren’t as close to the finish as he thought. The look on his face when I casually mentioned that the route was 68 miles and not 60 miles, don’t know where he got that from – he wasn’t amused!

We were soon at the second feed stop at Goathurst Common, which was a welcome sight although it was in some sort of car park so no indoors to warm us up. We didn’t hang around long so after a couple of hot drinks got back on our wheels. The final stretch came with a nice descent down Ide Hill into Sundridge where we crossed over the A25 into Chevening. Here we faced our seventh and final climb, Star Hill, also known as ‘The Wall’. Again a long gradual climb and tough at this stage but knowing this was the last climb of the day somehow made it that bit easier to cope with. Once at the top it’s a nice gentle ride through Knockholt into Berry’s Green and back into Jail Lane where it had all started over 6 hours ago!

I would say we rolled under the finish sign at 6hrs 50mins but they had taken the finish sign down so I can’t! In fact we had been gone so long our cars were the only ones left in the parking area! After such a long, cold day it was a bit disappointing, not only had the finish sign gone we didn’t even get a goody bag for our efforts, a crappy medal would have been nice, but no, for my £20 entry fee I got a certificate with a time on it so bad that I didn’t want to be reminded of it!

But all in all, despite the cold weather, the icy roads, the poorly catered for feed stops, the absent welcoming home committee and no goody bag, its was still a good day, and on the positive side, the course was very challenging, some great views and wonderful countryside. The route was well signposted and marshalled and the organisation at the start was faultless.

So, would I do it again, no, not as a sportive on a very cold winter January day. Am I glad I did it, yes, I’ve ticked the box and I now know the route which I will certainly do again in warmer climes. For those who haven’t done it before, go on give it a go, but I’d say once was enough!

Em